Big Easy? Far too easy…

I spent yesterday lunchtime at The Big Easy in Canary Wharf, grazing through the brunch menu like some particularly greedy livestock. It was a special occasion, as we’re celebrating @FrankDJS‘s birthday all weekend long.

I went in with the best of intentions…an omelette, maybe eggs benedict or something. Unfortunately, they ruined all my plans in an instant by offering an ‘All you can eat’ brunch option, which included bottomless ribs, pulled pork and chicken, along with with BBQ beans, fries, cornbread and unlimited Procsecco.

All for £30. There was no other option, according to my brain. I was in.

In to win.

And in this case, ‘winning’ was consuming more than £30 worth of food, so I could ensure I got great value. Yes, this is how my brain works around food. So I prepared by putting on my ‘bib’ and considering my tactics for maximal food consumption. I think you can tell this from the expression below.

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And then the (first serving of) food arrived. Amazing. Just enough to ensure we felt there was ‘lots of food’, but not so much that it was off-putting.

And there it was… Everything they promised. And it was delicious. The photos below illustrate about one quarter of what was eaten.

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The meal passed in a bit of a blur, but I know that I ate more than @FrankDJS or his sister and that I was the sole reason they brought two more follow-up portions of pulled pork. I had ALL the beans and one and half servings of the delicious fries. The corn bread was distinctly ‘meh’, but let’s be honest, when you go for a deal like this, you’re not there for the cornbread. You’re there for the MEAT.

Soft, succulent, slowed-cooked protein in the most delicious and finger-licking form imaginable.

They kept bringing the food and drink and I kept eating. I suppose, in a sense, they were simply enabling my gluttony. I finally had to stop when I realised that it had been a good 15 minutes since FrankDJS or his sister had eaten a thing. They were full and were watching me with poorly-disguised disgust.

I folded, leaving a half-chicken on the tray along with the possibility of even more pulled pork. Sigh.

What followed was a terrible dose of the meat-sweats. All my clothes felt far too tight and I needed to sit down. Or better still, lie down. And yet…and yet I could have eaten more. This is so very, very wrong.

A couple of hours later, after the difficult completion of a few errands, we were home and I was on auto-pilot to the bedroom for a brief nap. Four hours later, I was still unable to countenance the thought of food. Instead, I went downstairs for a long session in the sauna and actually felt much better once I was done. Some high heat and cold showers knocked me back into shap.

And so @FrankDJS ordered a delivery of Wagamama for us all. But I just couldn’t.

But then Wagamama replied to one of my tweets and gave me all the self-confidence I needed to polish off their excellent chicken raisucaree.

I’m not sure how I did it – I can only imagine that the brunch stretched my already capacious stomach to such an extent that it was able to cope.

Al in all, a most excellent day of calorie consumption. Not so great on the health front, but there you go. My main take-away from the experience is that there’s an unlimited brunch menu of this quality just a few minutes from my apartment. So I’m already planning the next visit.

Before they withdraw the offer, because of people like me…

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