Ugh…return of the Epilepsy

EpilepsyYesterday was not a day I’d like to repeat any time soon.

After a suspiciously long absence, my epilepsy returned with a vengeance. Three seizures in the course of one work day! By 6pm, I was not fit to do anything. Crawled into bed as soon as I got home and stayed there for nearly 24 hours. My brain was mush.

And oh how my head ached. I couldn’t bend over to take off my own shoes without blinding waves of pain thrashing through my head. Even looking left and right was a no-no.

I had my first seizure on the DLR  after my physico appointment . It was a brief absence seizure and left me nauseous, but nothing more. I plugged on and went into town to work. Managed to get through the rest of the day until a little after 5pm.

Two incredibly bad seizures followed.

A veritable checklist of symptoms… wave of vertigo, waves of fear, inability to read or recognise the written word. Inability to speak. Complete and utter confusion, wandering around an office. Sitting still with my eyes closed and hoping the fog would clear.

Not what most people think of when they think of epilepsy. I don’t (anymore) get grand map / tonic clonic seizures. They manifest as complex partial seizures, which basically reboot my brain.

While I’m trying to use it.

I explain it this way: you know you get weird error messages on a computer if you unplug a connected device? It’s like that. Like someone reached in and pulled out the power cord connecting various parts of my consciousness, leaving my brain firing just too randomly for comfort.

Once this all dies down, I’m left horribly depressed and lethargic. Plus, there’s the headache. Like your worst ever hangover.

And then some.

I’m hoping this doesn’t happen again soon. Really.

And I don’t share this for pity from random blog readers. In part, it’s to speak openly about epilepsy – something that was traditionally shameful and even associated with punishment from “god”. It’s the most common neurological condition, so you probably know someone (me aside) who has it.

Anyway, I’m resting up so I can fly to Edinburgh tomorrow evening to present at a conference Thursday and Friday. Small mercies: at least it happened while I was here and not in the middle of my presentation.

That has happened in the past and it wasn’t pretty!

3 comments on “Ugh…return of the Epilepsy

  1. I think it’s good to share. Epilepsy is much scarier and ‘worse’ than autoimmune (until they shut down your organs, then, I think it’s tit for tat) but that’s why I talk about it publicly. People don’t know. They don’t understand and I swear I know people who have it and it’s just not diagnosed. Anyway, good on yer for sharing and helping.

    And knock this shite off.


  2. I’m so sorry your going thru this. I’ve heard of it, but as you described it, it sounds really scary. I pray that you get better.


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