Visiting Ireland?

Then you’ll need this handy guide, courtesy of the Irish News from Northern Ireland. It serves as a brief guide to modern Ireland, North and South. My favourite quotes:

Ireland is an island to the west of Britain, but Northern Ireland is just off the mainland – not the Irish mainland, the British mainland. (Look, if you wanted a region where politics are easier to understand, you should have gone to the Balkans. Now pay attention.)

There are two parliaments in Ireland. The Dublin parliament is called the Dáil, an Irish word meaning a place where banks receive taxpayers’ money. The one in Belfast is called Stormont, an Anglo-Saxon word meaning placebo, or deliberately ineffective drug.

If you are planning to visit Ireland, I’d get in there quickly before the place implodes later this year. If I was an Irish taxpayer (which thankfully, hasn’t been the case for over 10 years) I’d have taken to the streets by now, demanding the heads of various bank executives and government ministers.

But then again, I’m the excitable type.

  1. This was so excellent!

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    1. fantastically put sir!
      bantics.wordpress.com

      Like

      Reply

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